Monday, April 20, 2015

Nothing Lost?

As we received the diagnosis of type 1 diabetes for Trinity, just 3 weeks after the same diagnosis for Selah, I sent a text to many friends and family asking for prayers.  One good friend encouraged me as I struggled with the 'if only' head messages I was sending myself. She also sent a message that said, "All gained, nothing lost."

Nothing lost?  What could she mean 'nothing lost'?  SO MUCH was lost that very instant.  We had been dealing with this silent, invisible, yet deadly disease with Selah for the last 3 weeks -- I knew the loss; FELT the loss immensely.  I then wrote back, "Well, some lost, but yes, time to move forward."

As my friend, she wanted to know what I felt was lost.  In her mind she couldn't make the word 'loss' fit the situation in which our family found itself.  The girls were now going to be able to heal. Become healthier again. We were now going to be able to give them life sustaining insulin.  To her, that was all GOOD.  A gain.  She pressed, "Not to challenge, but for my own enlightenment, what do you feel is lost?  Temporarily or permanently?"

This exchange led to a long, non-exhaustive letter outlining much of what I - we - feel has been lost as a result of this diagnosis.  Don't get me wrong, we acknowledge that we have much to celebrate.  Our girls VERY lives were saved by discovering the diagnosis, yet.... that same discovery ripped much FROM their lives as well.

Such a mixed bag.

Over the next days and weeks, my goal is to share what I wrote in that letter for others to see; to learn what this diagnosis 'looks like' from the inside.  With the help of my friend, I will do a 'question and answer' as well as 'what not to say', here on my blog discussing much of the loss that's felt when a parent hears the words, "Your child has type 1 diabetes."  As she explained, others - those not dealing with this disease in their lives - may have a hard time resonating with the words 'loss' and 'grief'. To them, our girls look healthy; they play; there's no 'visible' sign of disease.  So the sadness we feel, may not make sense.  They may question our grief.

In attempting to understand and even validate my own feelings, I decided to post the question on the diabetes support boards asking other families what they felt was lost through this disease.

The coming posts will attempt to address the many 'losses' felt.

If you have questions you'd like answered regarding type 1 diabetes and it's effects on the children diagnosed and the families caring for them, please leave a comment and I'll do my very best to include your questions in my posts.

Awareness is key.

This disease needs others to KNOW the risks, the dangers.  Through awareness, funds can be raised to help with researching a cure.

My prayer, my hope, is that through my posts, others will understand, a little bit, how this disease impacts families.

It's not simple.

It's not fun.

It's painful.

It's hard.

It..... is..... a...... loss!

No comments:

Post a Comment

I only check comments for spam.