Monday, February 17, 2014

Sometimes you have to break your own rules

It was 3 am.

The dog was barking in the hallway.

Since he'd gotten into chocolate, I knew it was best to 'let him out' despite my sleepy state.

Up I dragged my half-asleep body.  Feeling around in the dark, I found my warm slippers.  (It was way too cold NOT to grab those.)

Stumbling to the door, I tripped over my cowboy boots I had left near the side of our bed.  (Another good reason to keep ones room tidy.)

Finally, emerging from our bedroom, I walked out to meet the dog and lead him to the door.

He was resistant.

Can't say I blamed him with the snow and wind blowing at high speeds.  But, I was persistent and out he went.

Returning to bed once he came back in, I heard a little voice.

"Mommy, I had a bad dream."

"Where are you?"  My eyes had not re-acclimated to the middle-of-the-night-darkness after having turned the lights on to let the dog out.

"It's me, Charity." Came the response.

"Ok, Charity, but where are you, sweetie?"  I could still NOT see anything.

"Right here."

I stretched my arm out toward the direction of her voice.

Contact.  I felt her hair brush against my fingers.

"Do you need to snuggle a bit?"

With that she crawled into our bed.

Rubbing her back, I asked, "What was your dream, sweetie?"

"I don't want to say it."  She replied.

I simply hugged her tight.

"Can I just sleep in here for a while?"

We aren't co-sleepers.  (Outside of when the babies were super tiny and I was nursing them multiple times over the course of a night, our kids have ALWAYS slept in their own space.)

Techno and I made the choice early on to make our bed, just that, OURS!  So, as a general rule, we don't allow the kids to sleep with us.

This night, however, I could tell she. just. needed. us. close.

"What do you think, Daddy?"  I whispered.

To lighten the moment he responded, "Well, if I fall sleep, my snoring just might keep you awake."

Charity was prepared, "That's ok.  I'll just put my head under the pillow."

Stay she did.

Daddy's snoring did seem to 'jolt' her a couple times, but...... she did fall asleep and slept soundly, with no more 'nightmares', until the morning.

Yes, we broke our 'rule'.

I decided it was more important to send the message that "Mom and Dad are always available. When I'm scared I can go to them.  They will comfort me." rather than to 'stick to the rule' of kids sleep in their beds and parents sleep in theirs.

Granted, this doesn't mean that our bed is an open invitation, but it does mean the kids needs will be evaluated on an individual basis.

This morning..... she was able to finally tell me WHAT she had dreamed.  The comfort she gained from sleeping, safely, with mom and dad made all the difference.

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